i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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