i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
I have sent texts to the pizza delivery guy telling him he was beautiful. Oh and you almost got a ticket for pissing in public. And I smell like cheese.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
