Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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