I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize
