Soap is not a condiment
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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