He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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