I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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