We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
