the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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