Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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