There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
