Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
