I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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