next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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