how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
all I've ever wanted was a guy with twelve cats who will tie me up in bed
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Randomize
