You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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