That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
she looked like the before picture.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
