dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Randomize