it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
