guys are not supposed to queef...right?
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
Somebody started a fire in the kitchen. I puked on it till it went out. The firemen high fived me.
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
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