Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
