Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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