you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
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