we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
