I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
We left the knife in your bed.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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