So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize
