I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?