you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
