Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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