And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
