have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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