If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
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