Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
