just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
Randomize
