Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
