party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Randomize
