Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize
