Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
So help me Jesus we're never drinking together again. But weekends don't count. Amen.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
