dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
