What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
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