i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
You called information & said "connect me to johnny depp" when they told u it wasn't listed u said " try depp comma johnny he's expecting my call"
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I look excited, but its just a facade.
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
