I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Randomize
