Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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