fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I will die if light touches me.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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