Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
