I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
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why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
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I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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