Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
