woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Randomize
