porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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