I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Randomize
